Octoberfest in PHG: 1 week

While most – almost all – Clubs do an Octoberfest, the one at Planet Happy Garden will be among the ones to last a whole week instead of just one day!

And while most – almost all;) – Clubs publish what that will mean, PHG are not letting us know the easy way – food? dressing? shows? music? pricing?

Anybody dropping by is welcome to send me any Info they might come across!

Oktoberfest 2016 in Planet Happy Garden 26. September – 3. Oktober

New Resource: The German FKK Club Slang Dictionary

The other day I was all motivated: Going out for my first field report after the relaunch! Hadn’t been to FKK Verena for years now and it would be just on the way, less than 2km extra drive. One of the last chance to sit in the sun with – well, mineral water! And just maybe a nice blowjob, even a fuck-in-the-sun were within reach 😀

FKK Verena / ex Bel Ami: nothing new under the sun

German forums agreed that at this time it would be full of fresh-from-the -farm youngsters and admission (changing about daily) was confirmed via phone to be a bargain @€20,-. Hey, if the club sucks and the girls don’t, i can easily move on to Neby, Arabella, LuderLounge.

Forgot to take a pic myself - and google streetview is from 2008!-/
Forgot to take a pic myself – and google streetview is from 2008!-/

Parking easy along the roadside, not many curious views from the seriously working class ;). <RIIING> the bell, lovely chick for door service – real FKK (=completely naked except those shoes), somewhat skinny with boobs, maybe 20 or a little less… in my mind i had already booked and bonked her!


“That’ll be 20,-” – “I know, called you less than 1 hr ago”

“Been here before?” – “Sure, I know it all”

“Don’t remember you…?” – “Well, it’s been awhile! (Sh.t, I had hoped to be invisible 🙁 )

Changing to the Hessendress (<- first example – read on!), locking my stuff up, little shower … ow where’s my queen for the next 30 minutes? I really want those lips on my boner, those tits…, that puss … and i want it and her now!

Well, s.tuff happens. She had already booked another customer 🙁 What’s left for me? About eager 8 lovelies! Some not so eager actually – fiddling away on their phones, probably with their managing brother...

But at least three setting up an inviting smile at catching my look and one ever so slightly caressing her pussy with that not so slightly heinous look on her face. No introduction needed – they’ll change it soon enogh anyway. The smile changed to “Ha! Gotcha!” when she was sure that for the next 30 minutes she’d be well employed. And she got the game I wanted to play with her!

No more eye contact, instead a huge welcome kiss for my best friend! Taking hin pretty deep, already in public. A little while showing too the (few) other potential customers what she’s up too, some pussy sliding with me sitting on the couch, her on my lap, a first try of putting it in… sooo good! High time to find a room now!

This should not have been a field report…

when i started – the title suggests otherwise. But somehow the moemory carried me away 🙂 So I’ll abruptly leave out the rest (which in all honesty was a little less spectacular than start) and go back to what i actually wanted to let you know.

So after that room i was pretty happy and got out into the sunny afternoon for some recovery – and maybe establish another contact. Well, the contact was not female! Not under 30 and not FKK either!

Instead i got chatting with another punter, who has just put up a nice web resource – an “FKK Club German slang and abbreviations guide“! Just what I needed! :praisethelord: because so often there’s no english words to say what i want to say. And while I don’t know, how to simply include the page (which i was allowed and will do later!) from now on I’ll at least put up some links to those confusing terms – like “What the f… is a Hessendress?!”

For now, take a look at this!

Good day for me and site – and i won’t bother you with the next two rounds, but know that one happened completely in the open! Am I some sort of show off 😕 😛



Oktoberfests to the brim…

With the real thing in munich staying behind previous years’ numbers – funny enough only in visitors, not in ox meat consumed – more and more fkk clubs jump on the bandwagon and create their own oktoberfest. Most for just a day, though. But you never know…

While for me, Oompah-music is not the favorite thing, it seems to stimulate a certain kind of activity with males and females 😛 And frankly, even the traditional fashion is designed to pu the chicks’ assets in good view. Assisting in the hunt for a good man for life…

Some of the stuff worn for FKK- and Sauna- Clubs’ Oktoberfests these days is even more explicit – more explicitly helping with th hunt for a good man for the next 30 or 60 minutes 😀

You feel like being prey for some time? Or hunting the delicious stuff yourself? Together with slightly different food than on usual days, these parties are worth a try!

Here’s two more recommendations:

Oktoberfest @FKK LuderLounge
Oktoberfest @ Dolce Vita, Düsseldorf

All u can… (YEP, that!) @LaLuna, Oct, 13th

Now, this is unusual! Even for those of us us who are used to the unusual …

A serious Offer: AI at just € 120,-
A serious Offer: AI at just € 120,-

Let me start by saying that LaLuna, Moers is not actually my favourite location. It is a pretty dark (and even damp) place in the basement of a less then… shiny… neighborhood and actually not at a bargain price. However, it does have it’s regulars and fans – and they come there for legendary service!

So this event does deserve a special mentioning: 1 Day all you can (…do!) inclusive for just 120,- € !

If you’re not trusting your idea: Yes, this includes sex, too! And with (well, almost) no taboos…

Actually there’s other places with similar and even lower priced offer like that – Pauschalclubs / “Package clubs”. However, food offers there never lives up to what LaLuna put up on these events. And most of all, girls may sometimes be a little hard to reach in the other places…

Here, you can be sure to really get what you come. For. Certainly, 6 LaLuna girls make more guys happyer than 12 usual club girls – they do go wild! You’d better be willing to

  • share a girl
  • be seen in public
  • accept other guys

to get the most out of this – it’s gonna be wild. Really wild!

But if you’re up for unusual, you’ll find it there!

I’d love to hear how you liked it – if and when you’ve been there!

Villa Vertigo working… on price!

While I try to stay away from guessing about things behind the scenes, some things are obvious on stage:

Happy Hour:Only €35,- until 1 p.m.

Villa Vertigo, one of the finest fkk clubs of all, had a shortage of nice girls recently. And this leads into a downward spiral easily:

  • lack of (nice, fun) ladies leads to punters staying away
  • lack of motivated customers leads to ladies looking for a better workplace -or just grim ;-}
  • start again

By now, management have noted – and taken action! While a “2 come, one pay” special for males has been up for some days now, since yesterday there’s more:

  1. a €35,- happy hour for men and
  2. Completely free admission for new girls!

While the check-it-out-free for girls actually is possible

may check it out free
may check it out free

in many fkk- and sauna clubs, it’s not usually placed for the greater public. The Situation seems to have serious room for improvement!

Even more, the Happy Hour for guys is tricky, too: I might attract larger numbers of what is called “Frühstücksrenter” (=Breakfast Pensioneers) in German – slightly matured gents with daytime leisure but just maybe a little less financial (end even sexual) potency. They just might create a little extra cost for the club (mostly food and drink) without pleasing the ladies big time and cash

I certainly wish them the best of luck with that – for me, the place itself is fantastic. And the garden- and pool area even more. So, let’s hope whatever happened behind the scenes is handled, chicks and punters flocking the place again! I’ll try to make my way there within the next 2 weeks and let you know!

Oktoberfest in Villa Marisol, Sept 30

Yet another Octoberfest…

It’s getting hard to decide, where to go on certain days! Can’t possibly do them all…

Party – Hot and Bavarian Style

This one offering…

  • champagne reception
  • stripshows
  • rustic buffet, bavarian style
  • free beer & pretzel
  • live-DJ
  • erotic drawing (a little unclear – hopefully, we can win some “room time”, certainly some free admissions for next time) aaand
  • girls in dirndl dresses!

FKK Great Palace to cancel … FKK!

Now this is news:

One of the last remaining upper scale FKK places gives up just that! While the FKK Clubs have become an international trademark for fair, safe and affordable pay sex, fewer and fewer of them actually offer that very thing!

Male dresscode in typical FKK Clubs
Male dress code in typical FKK Clubs

As you probably know, it’s an acronym for Frei-Körper-Kultur, the “culture of a free body”. And putting the historic ideas (“no clothes, no classes” – everyBody is the same) a little in the background, it has become a synonym for just “naked”. In the context of our hobby, naked Chicks with man in either “Hessendress” (wrapped in towel) or “Eisbärenfell” (Polar Bear Skin – a white bathrobe).

But less and less clubs actually practice this style however popular it is with the punters. And in a way I can understand the ladies who – like any other chick – have certain uncertainties, things they wanna hide…

Pros ‘n Cons of “real” FKK

Understand that ladies prefer clubs where they can at least wear som showy underwear. So for clubs management, it’s always about balancing out to attract ladies and gents with similar interests. Some clubs on the upper end of the price scale even have Ladies and Gentleman in full evening wear (yep, dresses and suits!), while on the other end there’s

cheaper clubs (most famously the RTC-Chain) where you find a bunch of “fresh from the farm” girls who don’t mind. They’re in it for good money in short time and if being naked is the way, they’re all up for it!

So what does it mean?

Last holdout of real FKK in the upper range was the Great Palace in Castrop-Rauxel, which had recently been reopened and used FKK as the USP. Giving it up now most likely means, they see themselves in a position strong enough to compete the established names further west.

And yes, being the only place of it’s class in < 1hr drive range of 2 Million people just on the the exit of a usually un- jammed motorway should count for something already, and the place itself, catering, staff, pricing… have always gotten good scores – from me, personally, and in the forums.

So chances are, we’ll see an influx of ladies – and that will attract enough new punters to compensate for the loss of disappointed  fkk enthusiasts…

Time will tell!